So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
it hurts more in the daytime
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Randomize
