Bisexual people are plain selfish.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
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