I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
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