True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Randomize
