that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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