you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
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