This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
