how can u be prego again
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
