this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
