I just made out with a guy for $7.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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