Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize
