I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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