Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
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