Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
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