There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
not only did i soak my thesis by spilling celebratory shots on it, but i also stained it with lipstick making it obvious i tried to drink the vodka off it......dgaf, worth it.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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