Christians are straight up FREAKS
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
