spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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