Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
