I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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