this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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