I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
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