what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
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