Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
My bed is full of blood and feathers
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
