so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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