He asked to "fluff my boner.."
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
