I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
