Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
