I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
