is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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