I wanna passion pit in your ass
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
