is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
