Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
