You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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