Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
