I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
My apartment stinks of burning failure
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
