I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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