I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
