the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
