our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Randomize