So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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