I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
