You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
