Do vagina's smell?
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
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