you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
