Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
