so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize