Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
