i just google imaged poop.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
