How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
