I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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